Category: Virtual LP

Like a lot of kids, I grew up dreaming that one day I’d write a song about “accretion” (defined by Merriam-Webster’s as “increase by external addition or accumulation, as by adhesion of external parts or particles”).
No, I was told. No, that wouldn’t happen. Couldn’t happen. They didn’t say it shouldn’t happen. Or bloudn’t happen. But they might as well have.
Well guess what? Dreams really can come true. Assuming your dreams relate to writing a song about accretion. Take that, naysayers!
This latest addition to the Virtual LP features vocals, keys, ‘n drums. It’s partly influenced by my absolute favoritist record of the last few months — Harry Nilsson’s extraordinary Nilsson Sings Newman, from 1970. Holy cow does that record have fantastic harmonies. I can’t claim to match, but it did inspire me to close this track out with a few waa-oh’s and ooh la la’s.
Thanks for listening,
-Cecil
time: 1:44 seconds; specs: 1.6 mb
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Over the last few weeks I’ve begun tripping and cursing and toe-stubbing my way around the magical world of midi recording. The neatest thing so far has been seeing how easy it is go from playing a piece to printing out the score of what you just played. Crazy neat, in fact.
Much less neat has been the crackling I keep hearing coming from my headphones when I try to load more than one instrument in my brand new “Plug Sound Pro” soft synth. Or perhaps it’s not the soft synth that’s crackling and it’s just that my head’s on fire?
Anyways, here’s the first result of all that toe-stubbing and crackling — a Plug Sound Pro-free orchestral number that’s the first instrumental on the old Virtual LP since Double Agent of Love, hit the charts in mainland China back in the summer of ’04. This one’s called (Gibbous Moon) because I like song titles with parentheticals. And I like the word “gibbous.”
Keep on rocking (in the gibbous world),
-Cecil
time: 1:02 seconds; specs: (Less than) 1 mb
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It’s been about three months since I posted a new song to the ole Virtual LP — the last number being Welcome to Your (Doom of Clowns).
Happily, I found a little time this past weekend to record a tune I’d written a year or three back. The song’s called Styrofoam and it features lead vocals by the notorious Xian who did, I think, a rockin’ job.
Thanks for listening and hope ya enjoy the results.
-Cecil
time: 2:09 seconds; specs: 2 mb (yes, incredibly — another 2+ minute long song!)
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Earlier in the month I promised to deliver this here clown song, based on a line gifted to me by my son. “Welcome to your doom of clowns,” he said. Really.
Until a few days ago I thought this was an acoustic number — a vaguely Robert-Frippy 2/3 (or is it 4/6?) song about clowns. That was until I got some drum software (Fruity Loops — highly recommended). And then my electric guitar came back from the shop. I hadn’t played it in ages and — well, you know how that goes.
So…the song is still about clowns. But acoustic, not so much. I’m hoping to get around to recording the acoustic version one of these days soon, but until then, please: play it loud.
time: 1:59 seconds; specs: 1.9 mb (creeping toward two full minutes I am….)
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Update: The original vocal track was kinda messy and driving me nuts, so I replaced it this morn. New cleaned up version now posted, as of 10:22 am PST….

It’s been a little while since I’ve written a new song, but I’ve been playing a bit more of late and — hey presto — two ditties appear. Fun to get back to recording after a little break. Today’s tune is A Thing I Like to Do, the musical version of a post from a few weeks ago, now with vocals, keyboards, and a light dusting of guitar. It’s unusual among the original tunes on my virtual lp in that it’s nearly two (2!) minutes long.
Coming pretty soon: “Welcome to Your Doom of Clowns,” based on a line my 6-year-old delivered a few months back — a line I realized just this past week is one of the best song titles I’m ever gonna run into.
time: 1:53 seconds; specs: 1.7 mb
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Here’s a tune and a time capsule, written on a rare day when my daughter Shonny woke up in a so-so mood. Fortunately, it didn’t last.
-Cecil
time: 50 seconds; specs: 779K
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A few days ago, So-Called Bill posted a comment saying “I’ll pay you five dollars to write a song called ‘Starfish Sucking on My Nose.’”
Well. Never let it be said that I won’t write a song called “Starfish Sucking on My Nose” for five dollars.
-Cecil
time: 24 seconds; specs: 378K
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It’s been a while since the last track on ye olde Virtual LP. Much as Monkey Vortex Radio Theater is starting to crackle back to life, and a new Deathmarch is nearly upon us, I’m starting to find a little time here and there to mess around with music once agin’.
So here’s a micro-tune, written and recorded today for the littlest Vortices. It was Photo Day at school. A magical day, I think we can all agree. And one well worth celebrating.
Thanks for listening, -CV
time: 29 seconds; specs: 470K
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Here’s another track on the Virtual LP. If you’ve played a few of these before, you might recall that I have a bit of a thing for piano/vocal standards like (to name two…) The Best Things in Life Are Free and For Every Man There’s a Woman.
This time out, it’s an update of a classic you all know and some percentage of you love. Feel free to sing along at home with I Love Lucy, written in 1953 — lyrics by Harold “I wrote the lyrics to ‘I Love Lucy’” Adamson and music by Eliot “Yes you did, my old friend, but leave us not forget that I am the one who wrote the music to ‘I Love Lucy’” Daniel.
Thanks for listening and dropping by, -CV
time: 1:08 seconds; specs: 1 MB
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Just when you thought all the Cauliflower had been eaten, The Challenge returns! From the mysterious guitar-plucking fingers of a man called “xourmas” comes today’s shimmering turn of the Melon wheel. It takes Jake’s sax piece which took eb’s vocal piece which took the original piano piece…and it spreads a groovy guitar line across the top. The result: Cauliflower Jam.
For a quick recap of the journey there and back again, here’s the whole sequence:

• Cauliflower Melon (the original piano piece)
• Cauliflowermelonslide (Bob’s remix with slide guitar)
• Melancholy Flower (eb’s version adds vocals)
• Tower of Cauliflower Power (Yaniv slices in with mad beats and bass)
• Straight Up: Cauliflower (Jake adds sax to eb’s vocals)
• Radio Cauliflower (MC DD von H’s cauliflower jam)
• Cauliflower Maximus (MC DD von H’s opus!)
• Cauliflower Jam (xourmas’ groove thing)

If you’re out there and still thinking of jumping into the melon, just start with any one of these, make yer music, then email whatcha got to: vortex@mediajunkie.com. Thanks for listening. And thanks again to everyone who’s jumped in to-date. This project is the gift that keeps on giving. We’ll have to try another one sometime down the line….
-CV
xourmas’ Remix – Cauliflower Jam
time: 1:07; specs: 1MB
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