Blog

  • x-post: more MVRT madness

    To say today’s MVRT is in bad taste would be a little like saying BJ and the Bear were in a TV show called “BJ and the Bear.” They weren’t in the show. They were the show!
    Abu Ghraib: The Untold Story, now playing on Monkey Vortex Radio Theater.

  • x-post: Two new segments up on Monkey Vortex Radio Theater

    Two new audio-fun segments now ready for psychic absorption on ye olde Monkey Vortex Radio Theater: The World is Loud, a poem written and performed by Rodney K., and The Birth of Cheese — a thick stew of fear, loathing, and dairy products, scripted by Jolene Phelps.

  • Cole Porter Lives

    With the biggest smile, my headed-toward-four-year-old says:
    “Daddy?”
    And I say “Yeah?”
    And he says:
    “Since it’s such a beautiful day, I love you.”
    And that line, complete with matching catchy melody, has been stuck in my headbone for nearly 72 hours now.
    The perfect Cole Porter lyric, showing up nearly 40 years too late, at least from Cole Porter’s perspective.
    RIP Cole Porter.
    Tony Randall too.

  • Plastic cups

    You could find us
    by the smell of cheap wine
    in open-air plastic cups.
    See, we'd walked into this sunny summer party
    unguarded booze
    them all in college
    us two in high school.
    Strolling the lawn with our big red cups
    held chest-high
    both hands.
    We were alert and amazed.
    Thick-haired and thin-faced.
    Bobbing along
    like tipsy rowboats.
    Sipping small sips.
    Invisible.
    But not odorless.
  • Bacon

    My son wants
    bacon made out of coffee
    for me and
    bacon made out of orange juice
    for him.
    Leave those pigs alone!
    But keep the bacon coming.
  • A thing

    A thing a day a written
    thing a thought a memory
    a day it's not
    too much to
    ask too much to
    do.
  • Monkey Vortex Radio Theater

    Shhhhhh. Monkey Vortex Radio Theater, now on the air. Take it for a spin (and let me know whatcha find confusing and/or broken), here.

  • In Florida

    In Florida,
    the land of the dead for me.
    All those memories of bouncing on
    airboats through swamps, and
    wandering around exotic bird parks,
    and listening to King Crimson
    on the wide lawn
    under the wide sky
    by the reflecting lagoon.
    And sometimes driving, sometimes walking
    over to my great aunts, and uncles, apartments
    for bowl snacks and conversation.
    There was that one time --
    Meyer borrowed our walkman.
    Suddenly
    volume spun all the way up,
    all the way up
    he could hear again.
    Oh my god such a smile.
    All gone now, that gang.
    There were two Irvings.
    And all alligators gone.
    All tennis courts gone.
    All rec centers gone
    with miles of immaculate green felt pool tables.
    Key West too.
    And Florida is for me.
    The land of the dead for me.
  • I want to build a house

    I want to build a house
    with Richard Brautigan
    up on the third floor.
    Looking out a large window
    at open land
    hands on the windowsill.
    Wearing that old hat
    that old vest
    those old glasses.
    He looks good.
  • x-post: Zogby late to the party, calls election for Kerry 24-hours after Vortex

    Political aside: 24 hours after my all-imprudent edgewise post, below, big-time pollster John Zogby arrives late to the dinner party. But wait: we’re wearing identical sports goggles! Confused? Engraged? Perhaps a little…peckish? You should be. Read more about it here.