I have seen you eat eggs, and it’s a fearsome sight.
If I was an egg, and you looked in the window, I would start to cry. I wouldn’t have any legs, so I’d just rock back and forth, thin tears tracing down the hard shell of my face.
Now maybe you’d surprise me and not eat me. Maybe you’d wipe off my shell and make me your pet.
But still, if you ever ate eggs in front of me, with a fork or something, that would gross me out. And I’d be like: “Dude, don’t eat eggs in front of your egg pet.”
And you’d say: “Don’t worry, I only eat dead eggs.”
Like that made it OK.
You’re fearsome
Comments
3 responses to “You’re fearsome”
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Can you write one about bacon now?
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Here’s one from back in May of ’04:
“Bacon
My son wants
bacon made out of coffee
for me and
bacon made out of orange juice
for him.
Leave those pigs alone!
But keep the bacon coming.”
And the mildly odd thing: these both actually involved the little man — he’s the one who suggested the egg pet scenario in yesterday’s bit. And then there’s Morning Lion. So why is he so closely tied to breakfast foods? -
Because kids have not yet forgotten that Breakfast Is The Most Important Meal Of The Day! (Of The Day! echoes the song…)
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