Here’s a travel tip that works for me and might work great for you too!
When I’m away from home, sometimes I’ll see somebody on a cab line or in the hotel lobby who looks like my friend Dave. And I’ll go up to them and I’ll say: “Dave. Dave. Dave. Dave.” And they’ll say something like, “I’m sorry, you’ve mistaken me for somebody else.” And I’ll say: “Dave.” And they’ll say, “Can you step back a few feet? You’re standing too close to me.”
And I’ll keep saying: “Dave. Dave. Dave. Dave.” until eventually, through force of will, I cause them to transmute at the molecular level into my friend Dave. With Dave’s scruffy beard. Dave’s John Lennon glasses.
“Dave!” I’ll say. “Yes, I am Dave,” they’ll say. Dave!
Travel Tip
Comments
8 responses to “Travel Tip”
-
there is medication for that, among other things.
disclaimer: side effects include vomiting, nausea, IBS, warts, typhoid, rickets, ingrown toenails, rapid ear hair growth, teeth acne, evil possession, conversion to scientology, and nipple dryness.
i love tv drug disclaimers. -
i miss him too, but cecil, shoehorning yourself into someone else’s personal space and transmuting?? it must stop. you know why? ’cause dave–no, look into my eyes now–dave. wouldn’t. like. it.
-
Big poncho Dave? “There is always time to come to be” Dave? Or another one?
-
Laura: I was thinking more of a sort of composite of all the Dave’s I’ve known before.
Also: your memory is metallic! (for other folks just to put this in perspective: Big poncho Dave is someone I haven’t seen since 1989. I did write a poem about him tho, buried somewhere on this very site.) -
Yes–I remember things that happened twenty years ago with remarkable dexterity, while I can’t recall things that happened twenty days ago. I am exquisitely suited to live in the world of 1989. Or better yet, 1979. Now if I could match that with a career…
-
1979. Now that was a year. The year my family moved back from Holland to the States.
1979!
-Cecil -
1979. The best year in popular music. Arguably.
-
1979: How innocent I was then! They hadn’t even selected my haftorah portion yet!
-Cecil
Leave a Reply to Cecil Vortex Cancel reply